Another emotional affair...
I'm 41 years old, and I've been with my wife for 22 years, married for 12. We'd been distant and arguing for the last 4-5 months. I discovered last week that she has been talking to another guy for the last 5 months. She has so far claimed it was just a friendship, a guy to cry to when I wasn't listening, that may have gone too far, she started having feelings for him, and admits he was clearly looking for more, and she was leaning in his direction when I found messages she had with her sister on her phone about him. So I confronted her, maybe a bit angry, as this is not the first time she's had an emotional affair, but this is the first that was this long, or her admitting any kind of feelings for him. Admittedly I'm terrible at expressing my emotions, but I manage to when given the chance. I just started therapy to try and help with that.
Since I found out my mind is racing with the worst possibilities, I can't sleep. Now I don't know what to do, she deleted the messages so i don't know how bad they really were, she said not that bad, but how do i believe her, we've yet to have a real discussion.
I can't imagine my life without her, we have an 8 yr old son together, I love my family, and I love my wife, probably more than I should. I know I want to make it work, but am I being ridiculous, she's the love of my life, how can I stop this cycle.
3 comments posted: Wednesday, October 22nd, 2025
