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Trapped74 ( member #49696) posted at 9:44 PM on Friday, October 16th, 2020
Thank you OneBiglie, the number of times I've seen BHs on this site assuming the sex aspect hurts them more than it hurts BWs really pisses me off. Actually chased me off the site for a while. And there are a few posters on here that I won't read anymore because of that ridiculous, sexist, and flat-out wrong thinking.
Many DDays. Me (BW) 49 Him (WH) 52 Happily detached and compartmentalized.
Lsja ( member #74526) posted at 1:57 AM on Saturday, October 17th, 2020
Sometimes I find myself crying uncontrollably after sex. Its like it just bubbles over like when shaking a soda bottle before you open it. The tears are there before I even realize it.
It hurts SO MUCH to think of my husband eagerly giving himself to another woman. The thoughts of him getting super excited about her body. I can't stand it. The thoughts are repetitive and just won't go away. I can't understand how he could be so selfish and careless with my heart.
He would be horrified if I was the one acting out. He can't even put himself in my shoes. I don't think he'll ever truly know the depth of pain that he caused.
Some days I'd rather crawl into a deep dark hole and cover it over with dirt than have to replay the mind movies yet again. Oh how I wish I could go back in time. I would have never married a man who thought so little of me. Who knew though, he hid it so well.
NotMyFirstRodeo ( member #75220) posted at 7:49 PM on Monday, October 19th, 2020
Just wanted to say I hate it for you ladies. It's not us VS you. The bottom line is it is awful and you've my empathy. Mind movies are a special kind of torture that is cast upon all of us.
Every lie we tell incurs a debt to the truth. Sooner or later that debt is paid.
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